Table Talk

Thanksgiving 2011:

The echoes of laughter and the warmth of shared smiles linger in my memory, frozen in a moment that, little did I know, marked the last Thanksgiving our family would gather around the table intact.

Sure, there have been 12 Thanksgivings since then, each with its semblance of family, but it's never been quite the same. That year was the last time I truly reveled in the joy of the season. Unbeknownst to me, just six months later, the foundation crumbled as my parents parted ways. If I could turn back time, I'd freeze-frame that moment — the sound of my mom's laughter, my dad's infectious smile, my little sister by my side, and my older brother playfully picking on me.

Yet, dwelling on the past isn't my usual cup of tea. It's been a while since I allowed myself to unlock those distant memories, now seemingly from a lifetime ago. The reason behind this blog post isn't just to reminisce; it's a realization that sometimes the conversations or memories that happen around a table aren't universally joyous.

I just want people to understand that life unfolds in seasons…

In the rhythm of life, seasons ebb and flow, and therein lies the challenge — not knowing where the bookends of our experiences lie.

Perhaps, the hesitancy to fully embrace community is rooted in unmet expectations.

Whether it’s your Uncle delving too deep into politics, grandparents critiquing attire, or siblings pressing those familiar buttons — it's almost a given.

What if, from the outset, we anticipated these scenarios? Acknowledging that certain narratives are bound to unfold, we step into the gathering with eyes wide open.

It's about accepting the inevitable, understanding that we can't rein in their words or actions. However, in this acknowledgment lies a potent truth — we possess mastery over something even more profound: ourselves.

Now, this doesn’t excuse behavior, nor does it imply agreement with their actions. It's about choosing not to let their words and deeds navigate the course of your emotions or well-being.

In essence, a gathering around a table comes with its share of discomfort and irksome elements, but the true value lies in the larger picture. There's an uncertainty about when all those familiar faces will gather at the same table again, if ever. Yes, people might fumble through conversations or say something that would have been better kept to themselves, but that doesn’t always permit revoking their seat at the table.

So, even if your grandpa critiques the holes in your jeans, the true beauty lies in sitting down to hear him share tales of trudging through cold winters uphill both ways to school. This might be the moment you realize it’s not about the story itself…There's joy in the simple act of spending time together. While our words and deeds might not always find reciprocation, there's a peculiar beauty in everyone relishing each other's company. The less you attempt to control these dynamics, the more you grow to cherish table conversations for what they truly are — time that you’ll want back someday.